One of the daily tasks unique to the Air Wing is the FOD walk. I was disappointed to discover it did not mean Flaming Obliteration of Dirtbags. Turns out it’s Foreign Object Debris and everyone was going out there to pick it up. I heard you got to keep what you found so I decided I’d join the Marines and check it out.
The first thing one learns about the FOD walk is that you’re not allowed to bring your coffee cup. This made me skeptical of the whole exercise as a possible Communist conspiracy. The fact you can walk around with your cranial helmet in your hand but not a coffee mug is actually typical of the kind of military hypocrisy one encounters throughout a career of service. At least the Wing is being consistent with the rest of the Corps that way.
Everyone lined up on the far end of the taxi way facing the hangar. I could be using wrong terminology here but I think you get the picture. Besides, I’m a SgtMaj and by definition it’s impossible for me to be wrong.
Remaining abreast of one another, we stepped off looking for foreign objects and debris possibly littering the ground and could damage aircraft. We continued walking on line until we got inside the hangar where we continued to look for anything unusual.
I’m sad to report this exercise was actually kind of boring. I didn’t find any gold coins, or crashed satellites, or treasure maps laying around the area. The Marines aren’t supposed to talk much during FOD walk, effectively neutralizing my number one super power. Frankly, police calling the barracks parking lot is more interesting.