Thoughts on The Walking Dead Season 2

Been traveling recently and have noted 30 odd hours of airplane rides and layovers just may well be the catalyst which eventually sparks the plague of undeath.  Until that happens we just have to watch it on TV.  Which is just what I did yesterday catching the season finale of The Walking Dead while I lounged recovering from jet lag (I prefer jet hangover personally). 

*SPOILERS!*

If you’re like me you usually spend most each episode verbally berating the characters for their idiocy and cast judgement on the writers for their inconsistent character development. I could spend this post pretty much venting my spleen on the poor judgement of the characters but everyone probably already does that. Besides, you can’t blame fictional characters for being stupid just because the writers need a plot device. For example, at the end of the final episode Rick’s vehicle runs out of gas and they lament they have no supplies, blah, blah, blah.  At which I wonder how they have nothing since they just left a highway loaded with cars containing whatever supplies and gas they didn’t take at the beginning of the season.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Instead of doing that (well I’ll do some of that), I’ll just go over a short list of things you could expect out of me in a similar scenario and you happen to be nearby:


1. America’s SgtMaj is the leader of the group.  Sorry, I’m an alpha male with 20 years of military leadership under my belt. Yes, 20 years of making sound and timely decisions trumps: “You’re not the boss of me!”, crybaby bull crap.  Resistance to my authority in an emergency such as the Zombie Apocalypse will be handled swiftly and with an amount of force equal to or slightly greater than the level of hostility displayed by dissenters.  This does not preclude me from abdicating my authority to someone I think might do a better job of it.  As a senior enlisted adviser in my day job this is pretty much what I do already. I find it interesting it has taken Rick two seasons to figure out what I know from day one of the apocalypse:

THIS IS NOT A DEMOCRACY ANYMORE

Having established this let us move on…

 2. No one goes anywhere without a buddy.  In the military this is commonly referred to as The Buddy System. This means no one goes anywhere alone. This prevents folks like Dale from wandering out into open fields at night to have his guts ripped out by a zombie who was there because dumb ass Carl was wandering alone in the woods yatta, yatta, the thing, the thing

“La-de-dah, I’m a big boy in a zombie infested swamp. What could possibly go wrong?”

As a side note, if your kids can’t obey simple rules like not touching other people’s weapons, or wander off all the time, I will spank their ass clean off. It’s the apocalypse and we don’t have time for lectures, only discipline.  Am I the only one who wants whiny little Carl to die? I was actively cheering for the zombie to get him in the swamp scene. Yes, where he lost a pistol which he stole from Daryl’s saddle bags (a spankable offense in any reality).

Gahhhhh!! MOMMIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

3. Someone will be on watch at all times.  Military types will see this and groan, recognizing it for what it is.

Has binos and a scoped rifle, yet somehow never manages to see approaching hordes of undead.

 That’s right, standing duty. One of my many gripes about the show is a lack of security and accountability of personnel and equipment. The person on watch will likely be stationed in the most tactically advantageous position to keep overwatch 24 hours a day. The watch will also be given a notebook to write down significant events of the day and to help enforce the next rule which is…

4. No one goes anywhere without telling someone. What a novel idea! Here’s a crazy thought, what if the watch stander above wrote down where and what time each buddy team was going off to? I know, I’m just a goose stepping Marine SgtMaj set in his rigid ways. I guess this would also take away the plot device where everyone goes bat guano looking for someone, because all we’d have to do is ask the watch stander. 

‘Nuff said.

5. We will have a plan.  This is something the folks on the show never have. Here is a basic idea of what I mean. In my group we would ensure all the vehicles are topped off with fuel daily (provided we have any) and are parked in such a manner as to facilitate the Get The Hell Out Of Dodge plan. The characters in the show are reactionary and they suck at surviving. Anyone tagging along with America’s SgtMaj will know the bug out plan to include rally points and locations of caches containing emergency supplies placed sometime prior. In the last episode everyone just happens to show up at the spot where they lost Sophie. There was no prior planning on this just dumb luck. 

Other plans would include what we would do in order to defend ourselves against other people, and against hordes of zombies shambling out of the tree line. This leads us too…


6. This is what guns are for: Essentially, pistols are for fighting our way to our rifles. Rifles are for fighting our way to the vehicles so we can escape the insanely huge army of zombies eating their way through the countryside.  If there are more zombies than bullets there is no fighting to be done, just running and shooting things in our way. Notice I said: “…in our way.”  Turning around and shooting undead which are not currently an obstacle preventing your escape is a waste of ammo and will only cause to trip and get eaten. Also, shooting from speeding vehicles generally results in a miss, particularly when only head shots count. Even the infamous “drive by” is done at a very low rate of speed if one actually intends to hit the target.

I could go on but I have lamented about this show before.  At any rate, it’s been a little while since we discussed the zombie scourge. I know I feel better for it.

Semper Fidelis,
America’s SgtMaj

/ / / /

10 comments

  1. Re: “No one goes anywhere without telling someone.”

    I grew up the child of parents who had lived through and fought in two wars. This rule was serious business in our house. I didn’t even realize that the rule was part of my mental makeup until I went off to college and my roommates told me in no uncertain terms that they did not want my detailed itinerary every time I left the room. Now I make sure that I impart the information on a need to know basis. 😉

  2. It was very annoying to watch them parade their vehicles up and back while this character or that fired their pistols. They obviously ran out of ammo because they had been practicing this 3 to 4 hours a day since arriving on the farm.
    Swords. From the beginning I’ve said where are the ended weapons. No one in Georgia owns a freakin’ machete? I own two and I don’t even have a tree growing on my lot and I live on the plains of Oklahoma.
    I talked to a Korean War era Marine once at a Toys for Tots drive. He said if they had had swords in Korea he would have had plenty of opportunity to use them.

  3. Bookworm, rest assured your mental makeup is more than welcome at the Camp of the Praetorians come the apocalypse.

    Okie, I agree. I would probably arm most everyone with hammers come Z-Day myself. Anything likely to cause traumatic brain injury would do. I like how in the show they are able to stab pocket knives through the skulls of zombies. What the?

  4. Carl’s behaviour really distracts me from any other aspect of the story – and the adults just let him prat around or disappear whilst they argue and peel flippin’ vegetables. Ah well, they could get ripped to pieces by the undead, but at least they won’t get scurvy.

    The saving grace is that various members of the group have died unpleasantly and with a reassuring regularity, so this series might serve as a cautionary tale of what not to do in such a situation.

    Thank goodness Game of Thrones is back soon.

  5. Personally, I love the choice of vehicle Daryl went with… the LOUDEST motorcycle he could find.

    Really?

    One gunshot is enough to cause a herd of zombies to change direction, but those pipes aren’t even noticed?

    It is interesting the deviations from the Comic and the TV series… been a while since I read the comic, but I don’t recall Carl being such a pain in the rear.

  6. I love this show….Season 2 was much better than Season 1. The group’s lack of preparedness drove me crazy. I know Hershel’s farm was temporary but an escape plan would have been a good idea.

    Can’t wait for Season 3!

  7. I was sooo glad to see Dale get his.

    In “Talking Dead”, the show that comes on after Walking Dead, Dale’s death was lamented ad nausea. He “was the heart and soul of the group” and all that sort of nonsense.

    No.

    Actually, Dale was a meddling busybody who couldn’t mind his own business and was thoroughly incapable of adjusting to the new reality.

    Yeah. Gotta let the courts settle a survival issue while in the midst of the Zompocolyps.

    But, all in all, imho, the depictions of events, reactions and such in the series tends a bit more toward the carefully thought out that should be expected from randomly collected group of ijits from an over protective nanny-state culture who find themselves suddenly thrown into the end of the world.

    -Grimmy

    PS. If they only happened to run into a single fire team of combat experienced USMC grunts, they could finally turn around and go on the offensive.

  8. I agree completely with your comments. It’s a great show but it drives me crazy. I shout at the TV, What part of do not going into the woods by your self after dark do you not understand.

    Stupid Civilians

  9. Magoo, I hadn’t thought of the hideous deaths of a number of characters as a saving grace. But now that you mention it, I suppose it is. It’s also a great way for them to eliminate characters who never get any lines. Like the kid in the RV who got devoured. Did he even have a name?

    Randy, agreed. I’m not so convinced about noise attracting zombies. Otherwise every little odd sound in the woods would set them off. I did like them showing a horde of undead plowing through the countryside, smashing fences and whatnot though.

    Lauren, I find I spend most of each episode in fits until there is a small moment of awesome during the last 2 mins of the show. Just enough to get me to tune in again.

    Grimmy, my open disdain for Dale is legendary. His whiny defense of Randal who, if not a rapist, stood by and did nothing while his buddies raped two teenage girls. This was by his own admission too. I wanted to grab Dale by the throat and force hims to look each member of the group in the eye and guarantee Randal’s buddies would not come back and molest the snot out of all of them.

    I would also like to see a show about a Marine fire team patroling through the Z-pocalyse. We could call it: The Living.

    Mike, it makes you weep for the human race doesn’t it?

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