*SPOILERS* (If you haven’t watched it yet I only have derogatory comments to make about you.)
Fifteen minutes into the season premiere and the “survivors” were already pissing me off. Let me count the ways:
1. How about 360 degrees of security?
Last season their camp was over run by the ravenous undead because security sucked. Seems they learned nothing from this incident and stop on a highway jammed with abandoned cars. As they loot the vehicles for fuel and gear (and spare parts because their RV has broken down too. Surprise!) the guy on over-watch somehow misses the shambling HORDE of zombies lurching up from behind them. How in the world they didn’t drive through this same herd of undead earlier is left up to the viewer to figure out. At any rate, a little vigilance on the part of the characters would be nice especially considering two of them are cops.
2. Ever hear of the word reconnaissance?
They have one guy on a Harley as forward recon (real stealthy) and they get all jammed up on the highway before he comes back to tell them there is no way through. Kind of defeats the purpose. I am also not jazzed about riding a motorcycle around during the Zombie Apocalypse in the first place. I suppose it’s a personal choice.
3. When the zombies come they decide the best course of action is to get under the cars. WTF?
Get under the cars? How about get in the cars you clowns? Better yet, get off the road and into the tree line. I will say hiding under the dead bodies was brilliant. For me the hero of the show is Daryl even if I think he is dumb for riding a motorcycle.
4. How is it almost everyone in their group remains unarmed? They’re in AMERICA.
Seriously, if you are in the land of the Second Amendment during the Zombie Apocalypse and are unarmed it is your own stinkin’ fault. When almost everyone is (un)dead there will be guns and ammo everywhere. Try a Wal-Mart for heavens sake.
5. If you don’t want your gun taken away then you shouldn’t put it down. EVER.
The Havamal, the book of Viking wisdom, advises never to take a step without your weapons. In the Marine Corps we call this weapons accountability. When zombies stalk the streets this is called common freakin’ sense!
6. Those dumb enough to lose their guns should not expect to get them back, especially if they have tried to kill themselves last season.
During the Zombie Apocalypse the proper response to members of the group who are demanding guns but have demonstrated suicidal tendencies in the past is: “We are not wasting good bullets on humans just now. Here is some rope and I see plenty of trees. Either way just get busy and quit bitching.”
7. America’s 1stSgt is a combat tracker and would not return to camp without your little girl.
Tracking at night is indeed impossible. However, a good tracker will “sleep on the spoor” and continue at first light. Zombies be damned.
In the end I think the band of survivors in The Walking Dead are completely lacking in good order and discipline. What they could use is one of these: