If America’s SgtMaj moderated Presidential debates

America’s SgtMaj as moderator:

“Gentlemen, if these become knife hands the debate will be over early.”

 “You will have two minutes to speak.” Loudly thunks tomahawk into moderator’s desk for emphasis.  “Any questions?”

“Sir, your time is up…YOU’RE DONE! STOP TALKING WHILE I’M TALKING!”
 
“Gentlemen, what is it about two minutes you can’t comprehend? No wonder politicians can’t cut the deficit! I will NOT allow you to use time you do not have.”

“Did someone mention cuts?”

“STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP! FREEZE CANDIDATE! FREEZE!”
 
“Talk over me one more ti… SON OF A…!” Takes the stage, heaves offending debater’s podium overhead and smashes it to splinters. “WE WILL HAVE GOOD ORDER AND DISCIPLINE!”

Although any Presidential debate I moderate may not clear up any political issues,  a demonstration of Irish Judo is always in order. I suspect more broken furniture and flaming debris would add a little character to the proceedings.

Semper Fidelis!
America’s SgtMaj

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13 comments

  1. A SGM,
    Thank God we have humans who are not politicians. (I actually know a few and when they start talking, I have to remind them that I have the BS meter running).

    That’s why I’m voting for Alfred E. Newman. His motto: “What, me worry?”

  2. We disciplined few will never be called to lead our country like this. Our citizens wouldn’t understand moderation and discipline, they’d think the Japanese had taken over.

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