• April 21, 2009
  • 21

Everybody loves a winner…

My reputation as a PT stud in the battalion is well documented. We do a lot of Crossfit and my times and numbers tend to be better than the other Marines and Sailors we workout with. However, each person has their strengths and weaknesses and I don’t always get the best of everyone.

Lately, I’ve been getting beat like it’s cool. Guys I used to smoke check are putting up the numbers and leaving me behind.

Not that I’m out of shape mind you; just not as finely tuned as I was before. If I told you I was out of shape right now, you’d laugh me to scorn. Sure, training at Mojave Viper for six weeks and eating the way we did was not helpful. Not working out during all the pre-deployment madness wasn’t any good either. But those are just convenient excuses.

As shocking as it may seem, America’s 1stSgt may have let himself slip a little. *gasp!*

This is not acceptable! Not for America’s 1stSgt. I cannot allow these younger wolves to snap at my heels like this.

But do you want to know a secret?

Marines hate losing more than we love winning. Write it down because it’s true.

We have two companies of Marines running rampant all over the northern half of this island, and three Army regiments pinned down in the southwestern corner, doing nothing. What the hell is going on?

Gen. John W. Vessey Jr., USA, Chairman of the the Joint Chiefs of Staffduring the assault on Grenada, 1983

We hate losing General; that is what is going on.

Don’t you forget that you’re First Marines! Not all the communists in Hell can overrun you!

Col. Lewis B. “Chesty” Puller, USMC rallying his First Marine Regiment near Chosin Reservoir, Korea, December 1950

Chesty hated losing too.

I have only two men out of my company and 20 out of some other company. We need support, but it is almost suicide to try to get it here as we are swept by machine gun fire and a constant barrage is on us. I have no one on my left and only a few on my right. I will hold.

1stLt. Clifton B. Cates, USMCin Belleau Wood, 19 July 1918

Lt Cates held because the alternative was unacceptable.

The bended knee is not a tradition of our Corps.

General Alexander A. Vandergrift, USMCto the Senate Naval Affairs Committee, 5 May 1946

Why? Because bending the knee is for losers!

The taste of other people’s dust is bile in my mouth; with chunks in it. The proper care and feeding plan of America’s 1stSgt has been re-implemented. The intensity of my PT sessions has been cranked up to new levels of ferocity. My body has been brutalized during the last ten days and I deserve it.

I WILL beat you. Yes I will.

Semper Fi,

America’s 1st Sgt.

/ / / /


  1. Top,
    The “Army” has gotten very weak compared to the good old days. The “zeros” lead like they are managers at some Wall Street firm…not ready to lead into battle. I have so many stories of our leaders afraid to do anything because “somebody might get hurt.”
    So, to make themselves look better, they’ve become Power Point Pukes. All briefings have to have Power Point slides…and lots of terms nobody understands…nobody ever asked “sir, WTF are you talking about?” So, they’ll sit through a Power Point briefing and not ask a question…until it’s over….then the new 2nd Lt will ask his sergeant: “Sergeant, what did the major say?”
    If the Sergeant was me, I’d responed with: “Sir, I don’t know, didn’t you go to some kind of officer school or something? I’m just an NCO.”

    To get promoted in the “new Army” all you have to do is:
    1.) Pass your PT test
    2.) Sort of maybe qualify with your assigned weapon…
    3.) Attend a promotion school

    Never mind actually knowing your job or anything like that. We used to have to take an “MOS test” years ago. But they stopped because everyone said it was too difficult.

  2. Yep! You’re getting old. Now I know what to send you – a Brumby Rocker and an iPod filled with Barry Manilow and Andy Williams songs and a bottle of lotion for your aching muscles.

    Oops! Now put that K-Bar down. I am kidding.

  3. You have quoted 2 of my personal heroes here. And I had a biography of Chesty in my hand this weekend. I selected a different book instead, With the Old Breed by EB Sledge. I’ll get the bio next month.

  4. Hey there, I’m new to your blog. I can’t remember if I’ve commented or just lurked, but wanted to say hi. I’m a SAHM in Chicago who is endlessly grateful for folks like you who choose to serve. I used to teach high school English. The kids who went into the Marines always came back so grown-up. They went in as great guys. They came back to visit as men. And the Urban Dad & I are very aware that we get to live our cushy lives here because there have been and continue to be men like you out there.
    Interesting blog — looking forward to more!
    Take care,

  5. OMG..Urban Mom, I read your blog all the time…how funny that you commented on a friend of mine’s blog!!! Too cool 🙂

  6. From America’s 1st Sgt:

    Akelamalu; like I said, I’m not out of shape, just not at peak
    performance. Hey! Wait a minute…

    Karie; I beat asses on the regular. It is considered quite a physical
    feat to best America’s 1stSgt. I figure it’s mostly because I run my
    mouth so much.

  7. From America’s 1st Sgt:
    Urban Mom, what a coincidence, I was a high school English student. :-)No doubt in my mind that the young men in my charge are the best Americahas to offer. Rest assured that they are representing you all well.

    Noelle, no talking to other people on my site!
    Talk to ME!

    Songbird and Southern, no worries. I spent the morning in the Al Assad Crossfit gym doing pull ups with 133lbs tied to my waist. Younger devil
    dogs were sufficiently intimidated.

  8. OMG you are sooo needy…. fine, HI Mike, how are you?? Oh ..by the way..Did you know Urban Mom is posting on your blog? 🙂 hee hee…

  9. CI Roller; I have met Soldiers who were very professional and capable
    and I would serve with them any time. Others I find are a clown show.

    Usually I chalk it up to Marines being a completely alien culture to
    other services. But as you will see in my next post my professional
    opinion of particular units is not very high.

    T; don’t worry. Even on a bad stretch America’s 1stSgt is still pretty rugged.

    Coffeypot; if you send me an iPod with Barry Manilow I will spend every waking moment of my post deployment leave hunting you down.

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