Concerning the Fatness of Bodies

I’ve always taken some pride in the fact I’ve never technically inspired any of Maximilian Uriarte’s Terminal Lance comics.  

Then today everyone in the northern hemisphere pointed me to today’s strip where he gives me a shout out:

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeessssss!

This eerily resembles what may have actually happened during any one of my remedial PT sessions back in K-Bay. Marines hate fat bodies. When I say ‘hate’ in this instance I mean with the heat of a supernova. You know how I can’t stand the mcfattersons.

Today’s strip inspired some of my old Marines to remind me of the time I first met some of them as their H&S 1stSgt. One corporal seemed to my eye straining the acceptable standards of height and weight.

America’s 1stSgt: “Holy $#@% Corporal, are you married? What is your wife feeding you?”

Cpl: “Chicken and rice 1stSgt.”

A1S: “Rice? RICE? The chicken’s good but RICE? You don’t need that &*$%!”

According to lore, I turned to his sergeant and insinuated he might come to grievous bodily harm if  the young corporal failed to slim down. It is said I may have threatened to put them both on the Body Composition Program (BCP) if weight loss wasn’t achieved. I have a knack to inspire. 

Truth be told, any fool can thrash the snot out of troops. I always tried to ensure my guys came away learning something other than why they should never fall out of a run again.

Semper Fidelis!
America’s SgtMaj

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